1. The Awkward Wave
Lift your hand to anywhere around head-height, probably while timidly trying to smile and make eye contact with the waiter…and voilà! That’s attempt number one. Keep going – this tends to only work after a couple of attempts.
2. The Eyebrow Raise
Works best on staff who moonlight as ninjas.
3. The Loud and Proud
Everyone’s dad is this one.
It gets the job done, but now the whole restaurant knows that you didn’t ask for anchovies and had asked for olives instead.
4. The Praying Mantis
You wait. You watch. You spring and you catch the waiter! ‘Peroni! Another Peroni!’
5. The Ask Another Customer
‘Excuse me, does this have nuts in?’
‘I don’t work here mate.’
Well it’s a risk you take coming to a restaurant dressed the same way as the staff.
(This situation is occasionally saved your fellow customer takes no offence and valiantly takes up your cause, flagging down a waiter themselves.)
6. The I’m-Taking-Things-Into-My-Own-Hands
This one comes most frequently towards the end of the meal when you’re keen to get out in time for the theatre. Normally it only goes as far as getting up to find the right person. But I’ve heard of people just grabbing the card machine themselves to move things along a bit.
7. The NextMenu Way
With NextMenu you can call a waiter or place an order on your menu tablet.
Picture the scene: You begin a story. You feel that a gesturing with a glass of Côte de Nuits would somehow add flair. Press a button. Continue story. Glass of wine arrives. Finish story with panache.
Or maybe you’re adamant that the secret ingredient in the burger is harissa and your other half simply cannot see it. You call the waiter with the press of a button, continue expounding why your taste buds are so finely attuned this sort of thing, and are then proven wrong by the waiter. Ah well.